No one wishes to dampen the enthusiasm that arises with hoped-for breakthroughs in Parkinson’s Disease or any other disorders but, however tantalizing some of these reports may be, if they are false or unsubstantiated by scientific evidence they can be cruel and dispiriting. Picture a man dying of thirst in a desert who comes upon an oasis with hopes soaring for a drink of water, only to find that the life-giving well is dry. Of course, this analogy misses one conspicuous component, and that is that the absence of water in that well is inadvertent and an act of nature while, regrettably, some medical research is characterized by willful misconduct and marked by fraud. An illustration of such follows.
I frequently get up at night to take a leak.
(Editor: Can you rephrase that? ) (Lao Du: What’s wrong with it?) (Editor: It’s just not refined. Not genteel, get it?) (Lao Du: Jeez! Touchy, touchy, touchy! So, how do you want me to say it?) (Editor: I don’t know. Maybe, say you you had to see a man about a horse.) (Lao Du: Well, there were a lot of horses. You want me say I had to see the whole herd … in one night?) (Editor: All right, then maybe you should say that you needed to spend a penny. That’s an old British way of saying you had to go.) (Lao Du: C’mon! It’s not a penny I’m spending. It’s more like a nickel or a dime. Sometimes I go 5 or even 10 times a night. Depends on how much Yoohoo I drink. Can I tell ’em I had to take a wizz or a wee wee? Would one of those offend any hypersensitive puritans out there?) (Editor: Yeah, it would, and it arouses my pique, so those are out! And you’re pissing me off! Just say you had to urinate a lot, for crying out loud!) (Lao Du: Okay, okay. I’ll just use a medical word, and that should tranquilize all the prigs and ninnies.)